Last time I wrote around Christmas time. Things have changed a lot since then. After the New Year’s holiday with the family bunch in the Alps, I returned home, to start my new professional life together with Ian, at our company. We began on January 8th, and started working side by side in our new office. At first, things were a bit new and slightly strange — working next to someone whom I’m paying, yet without any clear source of revenue. But it was so nice to suddenly have an office to go to, and a friendly face there, with whom I’d be working side by side. And it is so good to build something meaningful, entirely based on what we think is right.
Some things still require some getting used to, for instance the balance between Ian’s “mentally being there”, actively working on stuff, focused, and what level of social-media-induced mental absence is acceptable, or even necessary — for someone like Ian who is so connected with people, and such an active networker. And who, once he finds a project that needs a lot of attention, will work deep into the night, obsessively, getting stuff done. Or the issue of driving to work rather than using public transport. The idea was that I would go to the office with public means, but then there is so often gear to transport, or there are errands to run in the city. And then that is an excuse to use the car.
After the first month which we’d spent sitting in the office most of the time, we started traveling — Ian needed to get some stuff from his home, furniture and also audio equipment, and so we rented a truck and drove up north. It was a really intense trip, because we combined that with shooting the first footage for a massive documentary film project that we have started working on. It will be the biggest project for us this year, and we even got Lynn to join us, as our producer. It’s incredibly exciting, but also incredibly demanding and challenging. But we’ve got such amazing access to some people that we cannot not do it. And it is also about a cause I firmly believe in — it’s the answer to my political quest that I began in 2016. Only a few days after we’d returned from Scotland, we then drove down to Italy. There we spent a week together with Gianfranco, he is a political candidate in the Italian election, and he is connected with the people whom we interviewed in Scotland. We stayed with his parents and had an absolutely incredible week there. It’d be way too much to describe here, I’ll cover that in other places, and in other ways. And it will end up in our documentary, of course. The end of the trip was marked by Ian returning by plane (we compensated CO2 emissions for that trip), and I returned with the electric car, a trip that took me two days, and allowed me to stay for a night with relatives in the north of Italy. I had a horrible experience on the way back — at one of the charging stations, I found a dead bird on the front of my car. Crying, in the dark, in the snow, I buried it. It was an unexpected shock, and I think I decided there and then that I am not going to eat any more meat.
More things happened, a whole bunch more. I was flirting with a Tinder contact — in South America … At some point, it began to feel like too much, and not right, and I had to stop it. We are trying to move ahead with our show with Maik, but it’s slow going. Today I’m travelling to a meeting about that, who knows, maybe that will help us make progress. Ian and I are developing a comedy show, together with Brandon, and his friend Mercer. It’s a little hard, sometimes, to justify the investment in that project while we have so much else going on, but at the same time it’s good to focus on silly fun when there’s so much political stuff going on. Yesterday, I had to leave the office at mid day and go home and rest. The past three weekends were filled with work, and I was just burned out and needed a break.
I was incredibly happy about the documentary project, when we were in the thick of it, and working on it, and pushing it forward. I felt like I had finally found my new calling, after two years of looking for it. But then last weekend, our meeting with Lynn dampened my enthusiasm somewhat — I realized how much work there is still to do, and how steep the challenge. Now the job is to bring that enthusiasm and optimism back, and roll the sleeves up and enter into the next phase of developing it.
And I am convinced, we’ll get there. I think we can make a great film.